Pick Me Up
I had my first pumpkin spice latte of the year today! Funny how something so little can brighten your spirit. I love knowing that the season is about to change. The weather is still stuck in summer here in Cali, but I have hope for those blustery, crisp, sunny mornings. I’m looking forward to apple picking in the orchards of Oak Glen. I can’t wait to start making hot cocoa and apple cider. My favorite part of colder weather is the cuddling though (:
Throughout the past month, I have been trying to re-evaluate my emotions; what stirs them and how to have more control over them. As a woman, this can prove very difficult. I am a very emotionally driven individual. I have my heart on my sleeve more often times than not. Sometimes I trust too easily, and sometimes not nearly enough. I’ve begun steering myself into a more conscious state of feeling. I realize that I need to focus on where I would like to spend my psychological and spiritual energy. Most days, I feel completely worn out in every way possible. I feel like I’m spread too thin, but in reality, it’s because I’m investing my emotions in the wrong aspects of my day to day life.
If you take a few moments to quietly contemplate how your attitude has correlated with things that happen throughout your day, you can find areas which may have been filled with more worry or stress than necessary. Today I have been without my anxiety and depression medications for twenty-one days. It’s been a struggle getting here, but through all the obstacles, God has really taught me how to appreciate the little things and not to get caught up in a few short moments that won’t last.
I was focusing so much on losing weight and seeing the number decrease on the scale that I forgot about nurturing my mental health as well. Whenever I saw that I wasn’t losing weight, I was immediately getting down about that and everything else in my life. I’ve really had to take a step back and acknowledge that I’ve been abusing my time! We’re here to make something of our lives, more specifically to bring God the glory, and I refuse to take away from that focus any longer than I already have.
So with autumn coming, a new, beautiful season, a new outlook on my present and future days is also arising. I’ve felt this motivation before and I’ve talked about making similar changes as well, but it’s underway now. Moving on up and the only way to move is forward. I’ll need prayer. I’ll need encouragement. I’ll need all the mental, physical, and spiritual help that I can get! No going back now though! I see a light at the end of the tunnel and I’m following it.